Life is really unpredictable.

One minute, you happy, thinking this will be the day that everything will be going smoothly.  The next thing you know, that feeling was taken away from you.  You feel very very very down and think “not so smooth after all..”.  A few minutes later, you back to being happy and this feeling might stay until the end of the day if you are lucky

Why do I say lucky? Coz there are people out there who can’t stand seeing you happy what  more enjoying life. Seeing you happy makes their day unhappy. So in order for these people to have a happy day, they make your day as bad as possible.

You might says I’m being ridiculous, it’s ok. I understand. But if you are in my shoes, you will understand what I’m trying to share here and that is why I never miss a day checking the newspaper looking out for travel deals available for me to enjoy myself and forget all the mean people around me

Yes I do. My kids been bugging my precious computer at home especially Josh. Oh yes, mommy has no chance with her own PC. Josh always get it first hand. Sigh.

Of coz I can just stop him. Of coz I can just use my authority but knowing how good he is when he’s doing his very very hard homework and finish it with a promise he can play the PC afterward, I surrender. After all, he deserve it.

Sigh. I need my own laptop. yeah, a laptop, netbook whatever. The smaller the better. Of course I want all the power like my desktop PC has. Well at least I can view my email or watch a short video. I wanna use my hubby’s one but his own is so old and furthermore, he always use it.

I just want to let it out. I am not sure sometimes what I really want. I do know one thing, my children’s need. Milk, diapers and their foods.

Anyway, what about me? What is my need? Is wanting something like a full time nanny in the house is a need for me now? Is wanting to have all the nice shoes out there a need for me? Or is wanting to go out shopping with no limitation on what I can buy is a need to me – or is it just a mere wish?

I do know like right at this very moment, I want a nice, easy to use, dummy proof camcorder to capture all my kids behavior especially at weekends. Yea, thinking about it, I do want a camcorder. I just hate to story-telling my hubby when he comes back at night on what funny or sweet things his kids do to me. He always reply with an answer, “Serious? Really? You’re kidding, right?”. Like that. So if I have a camcorder, I just let him see it. Done. Haha.

I am not complaining. I just cannot sleep now. Thinking about the house and the available space for my kids and my hubby. Sigh.

Just wanna say, I think I’m getting used to go exercise after my working hour. It’s like eating and brushing my teeth. It’s the routine that I love to do nowadays.

Especially after hearing hubby said, I look better after so many times breeze walking. Sometimes I’m not sure whether he really means that but still I feel better for myself. I do feel energetic. Now I want to up the exercise routine. This time I wanna make sure I not only go for breeze walking but really run all the way. I did actually at Bukit Padang. Girls, I tell you. It really hurt on the knees. To add the pain, my current shoes are not meant for jogging.

Damn, the things I have to do so that I do not have to take all those diet pills really sometimes, taxing my mind and body. However, do you think it’s worth it? Listening to my body and to what hubby said, I think it’s all worth it. After all, I am not young anymore but I have to take care three young kids and not to mention the ‘youngest boy’ in the house. I need all the energy I can to make everyone happy. Imagine carrying the twins left and right and the elder Josh want to join in too. Fainted!!!

Yeah, do not believe what he said about your face. If he said you’re beautiful, the more you should be curious about it. Yeah, be curious because you know deep inside, you know how you look anyway. He just want to avoid further discussion about it. Aha!

Yeah, I just thought about this. Life is really shorter than anyone thinking. The moment you stop enjoying your life, you are already dead! Yeah. I think this is true – to some extent of course.

If you just busy working the heck out of yourself, ignoring your need and the life around you – you surely gonna die faster than the people who do nothing but enjoying their life out there. You know why? Well, there are so many reasons but one reason I know that can lead to your early funeral is by staying stagnant. Not moving your muscle. Thinking just by using yer brain … well still considered not moving. You die fat probably. Ooops. Serious friend. you need to exercise even though you are working. The best thing of course, go holidaying. Best for the mind and the body. [not so good in the financial dept though] but who cares. If you think it’s worth it, and I tell you, it is worth it, you will do anything to achieve it – I mean the money to finance your holiday shopping spree.

I like to share this short story with you all as a reminder especially to myself, who often forget when I’m angry

While a man was polishing his new car, his 4-years old son picked up a stone and scratched lines on the side of the car.  In anger, the man took the child’s hand and hit it many times, not realizing he was using a wrench.

At the hospital, the child lost all his fingers due to multiple fractures.  When the child saw his father, with painful eyes he asked, “Dad, when will my fingers grow back?” The man was so hurt and speechless, he went back to his car and kicked it a lot of times.  Devastated by his own actions, sitting in front of that car, he looked at the scratches the child had written ” LOVE YOU DAD!”  The next day, the man committed suicide……